Tooth fairy

Since I last wrote, I feel much more settled into the routine of life back home (Fiji).   We had dinner with friends last Saturday, had a lazy day with play-dates on Sunday and back to the regular work week on Monday.  Actually, it wasn't so regular as I found myself at a resort with my friends for Liz's birthday.   I decided not to bring along the kids, so I had a lovely Monday evening on the beach celebrating one of my favorite people!   We spent Tuesday on the beach and eating my favorite pizza at the Eco-Cafe before heading home to meet the kids on the bus.  What a nice little escape!

Today I went to the dentist.  The dreaded dentist.  As I mentioned before, I was supposed to have over $800 USD of work done on my teeth.   I was DREADING my fillings.   Well, the dentist here took a look at the xrays and the treatment report and said that he doesn't think its a good idea to compromise the tooth right now.   He said if I brush my teeth super well every day it could be just fine.   Well, you cannot tell me that I don't need it and expect me to beg for it! I was relieved!   I vow to brush my teeth so well - I'm telling the world!    P.S.  Fillings here are only $45 USD before insurance, so even if I get all of them done - no way I'd be paying $800 USD.

One last sad moment....  Andie has been asking me regularly if the tooth fairy is REALLY REALLY real.  She usually asks me around Zoe so of course I always insist that she's real.  Last night, Zoe was already asleep and she asked me again.  She looked up at me and said, "Mommy, I feel like you and Daddy are the tooth fairy.  Please tell me the truth.  Are you the ones who put money under my pillow?"  I asked, "Do you really want to know the truth?"  She replied, "Yes....please Mommy."  I just nodded my head and told her the truth, that Daddy and I are the ones who put the money under her pillow.  She said, "Yes! I knew it!"  She was so pleased with herself that she was right! She was grinning hugely.  (She later bragged to Warren, "I know the truth!!!"  Just as quickly as she smiled, all of a sudden her eyes started to water.  She said, "I think I'm sad.  I am sad."   I had to choke back my own tears (thank goodness it was dark) just thinking about that magical part of childhood being finished.   She asked me if all fairies were pretend, and I said, "I don't know for sure.  They could be real.  I know the fairies and gnomes at Bebe and PapPap's just show up.  I don't put them there."   She seemed relieved at this.  (Andie is so into fairies.  She wants to build a fairy house and leaves notes for fairies and has ALWAYS believed without a doubt....with the exception of recent doubt of the tooth fairy).   I was absolutely dreading her asking me about Santa because I just don't know what I would say.  I guess I need to prepare myself.  We talked a lot about keeping this secret -  keeping the magic alive for anyone who does believe.    She asked me why I couldn't tell Zoe and I said I don't want to destroy the magic for her.  She replied, "You just destroyed it for me."  Knife.In.The.Heart.  I felt so badly.

I don't know if I did the right thing....but I do know she's growing up.   I hope there will still be magic in the little things for her.   I hope she still believes in what she cannot see...   I need to treasure all the little girl moments left with her!


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