Showing posts from May, 2017


My girls are growing too quickly.  On this night of  Zoë's seventh rotation around the sun, I cannot believe what I hear out of their mouths.  I love them both so much my heart could burst and I would do anything to protect them....but sometimes I feel limited.   As we were going to bed tonight,  Zoë said to me that girls are fancier, but boys are way cooler.  What?  Where is she getting that from?  Haven't I taught her to believe in herself and know that girls are just as good as boys, just as strong, just as capable?!?!   I run a girls' group every week where I teach these things,....can't I teach them to my own girls????     And then.....double whammy....Andie says to me that she wishes she could re-do her life and have all the same experiences but just be prettier and more popular.  What?!?!!!!!  This is coming from my independent, unique, creative girl who has never cared what people thought about her.   She is struggling to find her place without Lainey....and

Zoë birth story

On the eve of  Zoë's 7th birthday, I just re-read this about our beginning together.   I wrote this seven years ago, not knowing who she would become, but already knowing I was in complete love.  Happy birthday my beautiful girl.   I fall more in love with you every day.   (Birthday letter soon to come) 5/24/10 – 2:53 pm 8 lbs, 4 oz, 20.5 in It was three days past my due date and the doctor told me I had not progressed at all since my visit a week before.  I was still only 1 cm dilated, -3 position, and had an extremely posterior cervix.  She told me again that she wanted to induce me that upcoming Saturday, one week past my due date.   I was completely depressed.  I did not want to be induced.  I wanted to pursue a natural childbirth, like I had with my first daughter, and was scared that I would not be able to do it if I was induced.   After much anxiety ridden discussion, she agreed to wait until 10 days past my due date, but said that was it.  It was a compro

What's your billboard?

This week a friend told me she went to a Moms and Martinis party hosted by her neighbor, who is a life coach.  This neighbor is trying to set up a side business of being a "mom" life coach so she hosted a little get together.   In the beginning of the party she had everyone pair up and answer questions like, "What is your life dream?" and "If there was a billboard with a life motto on it, what would yours be?".   My friend brought back these questions to all of our friends and it's started some great discussions. My gut instinct was for my billboard to say, "Be kind." or "It's better to be kind than right," just because those are the things I say incessantly to my children.   I then thought about MaMa Rut's words, "Keep Dancing and keep taking care of each other."  I really LOVE that as a life motto- take care of one another, but also enjoy life.      Warren said his would be, "YOU CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE&quo

Mother's Day

For Mother's Day, my friend Tricia and I escaped for the night to the Warwick .   At first, I felt a little guilty leaving on Mother's Day, but after my recent bout of single parenting and knowing I would spent half the day with them on Sunday, I left completely guilt free and stoked to be spending the night away.    After a good run on Saturday morning, Tricia and I left mid-morning for the 1.5 hour drive to the Warwick.  We first stopped at Eco Cafe for my favorite pizza/environment in Fiji.    (Fiji expat world is so small we saw two other people from Suva there).   We soon arrived at the hotel and got a corner room on the adult only beach and pool!   It was so lovely.  We enjoyed laying out by the adult only pool, sitting on the adult only beach, eating an amazing dinner complete with seeing meter + sized sharks  and great conversation all day. Sunset.   The little island is where we ate dinner.   Good conversation with a good friend at sunset.....   full m

Fiji in the perfect picture

When you think of the perfect picture of Fiji, you would probably imagine a beautiful sunrise or sunset over the ocean, palm trees, sandy beaches, etc.  That is certainly all here in abundance, but there is another side that the average tourist may not spot from a resort.   The picture above has it all.  Here are my friends and I stretching on the side of a taxi stand after a "race" of sorts.   It's raining hard as I took this shot (typical Suva).   You can see a bag of smashed kava root hanging in a white grocery bag hanging on the side of the stand.   This is used to make grog or kava.   There are two plastic bowls there with bilos (coconut shells) in the bowls used to mix and drink the grog from.  There is also a rag hanging, used to strain the kava.    The two random office/car seats seem to be everywhere where people may wait or gather (car wash, taxi stands, etc).  To top it off, there is the Suva Bowling Club sign (lawn bowling) and a Fiji water bottle

Farewells and Culture

This week was yet another farewell.   This one was also a hard one.  Diane and Christian have felt like such a stable part of Fiji for me.  They were some of the most welcoming friends in the beginning and they were the first people who invited us to dinner.  I remember sitting in Diane's kitchen 2+ years ago, thinking, "I really want to be friends with her!".    I am so glad we did become friends!   It will be so weird to not have them here.  Diane's smile and demeanor feel like part of my foundation here.    It's always nice to know you have someone stable to rely upon.  They were both very involved with the school, the embassy, and the community - and were the perfect people to turn to for help.    One day Christian spent a whole day with Warren just helping him fix a smoker, transport a smoker, and smoke some meat - just because that is who he is- wanting to help.    While we may not agree on everything, we have found a common ground and truly enjoy each other

5 weeks done and done!

Image my kid is stealing all of my blog material!   Was going to talk about another weekend full of playdates, the black sand beach, and a farewell dinner....but you can pretty much see all of it here. Enjoyed a foot massage in a very seedy place, while men took kids to beach.  So nice! Cannot believe Diane is leaving.  More on that later... And........big news here.....after 5 weeks of solo parenting (with a brief 24 hour respite), Warren will be home tomorrow!!!!!!!   I'm so happy.  I am really beginning to doubt my parenting skills.  My patience is pretty much at zero.  I have so much respect/admiration for single parents.   It's no joke.   I mean, the homework alone nearly put me over the edge.   I have good kids but they are kids...and no one is perfect....especially me. In other news, I got a haircut.  Whoopie doo......   Here I am in Andie's class doing a lesson. Also, I think I have slight OCD when it comes to planning my bestie's vacay he